komadori’s green corner

A startling new discovery from Swindon Arts Centre Café: a courgette is not the best tool for stopping a water leak. I’m so glad I know that now. My life will never be the same again.

I thought scepticism of everything that estates agents and housebuilders say was now second nature to most people. Clearly, there are still some exceptions. Of her not-so-nice new home in Okus (or, as the house builders call it, Angel Ridge), resident Nadia Lewis is quoted as saying

These are meant to be prestigious homes.

Since when has a four-bedroom town house in a development of 500 houses on the site of an old hospital been ‘prestigious’? Don’t get me wrong, I’ve nothing against her and her neighbours trying to get some bad publicity for the builder, to encourage them to fix the problems with their houses.* I just think it would have helped their cause more if she hadn’t made a fool of herself in the process.
* Any builder that describes Old Town as having a ‘traditional market town ambience’ or life in Swindon as ‘urban living at its best’ deserves a good dose of criticism.

It looks like we are in for an old-fashioned boundary dispute between Swindon and Wiltshire councils. Expect lots of petty politics, with each side saying what a disaster it would be if the other council’s proposition came to pass. In response to Wiltshire’s bid for unitary status, Swindon proposes an expansion of its territory into North Wiltshire, to accommodate the government’s proposed growth plans for the town. There has already been much petty squabbling between county and district councils with associated waste of council-tax-payers’ money (note in particular the opposing conclusions drawn from one MORI survey). We can expect much more.

There is one thing that puzzles me in Councillor Bluh’s comments though.

There are no certain plans to expand into any specific areas at this stage, but obviously it would not be possible to expand to the east because of the boundary with Oxfordshire.

Why is Oxfordshire being treated with such deference? It’s not that long ago (1974) that the Vale of White Horse was part of Berkshire (which itself disappeared as a council in 1998 when its districts gained unitary status), so the boundary can hardly be described as sacrosanct.

Update: Well that was a big fuss about nothing. The proposal got a unanimous ‘no’ at Monday’s council meeting. That’s a rather quick about-turn from Mr Bluh.

’Tis the twice-a-year event when employees in the public sector get a few letters tagged after their name for that great achievement of just doing their job. This summer’s local winners of a gong are Thorne, Winstanley and Pilcher-Clayton, all either of or recently departed from the Research Councils and… that’s it. To quote from the Cabinet Office

As usual, this Honours List reflects and pays tribute to outstanding achievement and service right across the community and the nation as a whole.

Not much evidence of that here, just public sector nominees.

As in previous lists a key aim has been to reward those who work and serve at the sharp end – people who have really changed things, or who have given outstanding service to others in difficult situations.

There’s nought sharp about sitting in an office in Swindon.

All the names in the list (946) have been nominated by the public or expert organisations.

I can almost hear the sound of hearty backslapping from here.

As a further means of giving public recognition, the new Emblem has been introduced; already more than 3,000 have been sold.

Sounds like one of those things where those most deserving of recognition (those that have ‘helped others in difficult situations’) are most likely to be of such humility that they would not dream of wearing it. NuLabour, commercialising old British traditions. Nice.

Given how unpopular the original plans to concrete over the land surrounding Coate Water were, you’d think that, once the University of Bath decided to abandon their plans for a campus in Swindon, the council would allow the idea to quietly die. Not a at all. Seems they want to go ahead anyway, regardless of whether there’s a university interested. Political genius.

I realise this is a little churlish, as I think the proposal to re-introduce hot school meals to all Swindon schools is sensible. It’s just that one of the reasons given is somewhat at odds with conventional wisdom.

Swindon Council wants to see all pupils in the town’s schools getting a warm nutritious lunch to give them energy throughout the day.

Err… have they not heard of ‘the afternoon nap’ as brought on by a filling midday meal? But if, as suggested it is to give them ‘energy throughout the day’, perhaps they mean breakfast… or that the anticipation of the meal to come will get the children excited during the morning.

One other thing. Since when have meals at schools been school lunches: they’re school dinners as served by staff known as dinner ladies (I suppose that would have to be changed now to dinner persons). Lunch is the toff’s meal.

I find the response from a local bed-and-breakfast hotel to a planning application for a new Jurys Inn in central Swindon a little strange.

Mark Gregson, owner of the Royston Hotel in Victoria Road, said the bigger chains could afford to squeeze local businesses out of the area. He said: “When the Travelodge opened for business I think we reached the limit of beds to customers, and if another comes along I think it will have a negative impact. The big companies have an advantage because they can afford to cut their prices by half for six months. They can run at a loss due to their financial backing and that’s something we just can’t do.”

Well… yes… that’s all true. But Jurys Inn is not really in the same market as The Royston Hotel, in which I stayed for almost a month when I first came to Swindon. Even at half-price, a room in a Jurys Inn would still be more expensive than the equivalent in The Royston. This is a little like M&S complaining of competition from Woollies — there’s a little overlap in what they offer, but not much.

Nice to see that our recently elected councillor has a good grasp of the matter.

Central ward councillor Derique Montaut said the problem was similar to the dominance of big supermarkets. “While we recognise the positive side of this for Swindon, attention has to be given to the local traders who could be forced out of existence.”

No Derique, not at the prices Jurys Inn charge. And whilst there has been a recent local casualty to increased hotel competition, that one was part of a national chain.

Oh, one other thing. The Royston Hotel does a very nice full english breakfast. I strongly recommend it.

Having once lived, for four years, in a house facing a six lane dual carriageway trunk road, and for most of my childhood having lived very close to a main railway line, I’ve always been of the opinion that, if you chose to live by a main traffic route, you should accept that it’s going to be noisy. Not so the parishioners of Stratton St Margaret who, after six years of campaigning by their local MP (like most of the parish councillors, a red nestling), have had £160,000-worth of ‘acoustic barrier’ (tall wooden fence to you) constructed alongside the A419 Stratton Bypass, with another £240,000-worth to come. A resident quoted in the newspaper sums up my views.

Student Scott Jefferies, who lives behind the new fence in Winton Road said: “I don’t really think the fence has made much difference. You can still hear the road from outside but you can’t really hear it indoors at all. And to be honest you just get used to it. I have lived with it so long I hardly notice it anymore.”

If the picture of the MP grinning in front of the fence is typical, that’s hardly surprising: a dense growth of trees is clearly visible behind.

One of the best places to learn about British culture is… a well known fast food retailer. Yes, according to their local franchisee, a McJob is a good way to get an introduction to the finer aspects of British traditions.

Paul Booth, franchise owner of five Swindon restaurants, said: “The ‘McJob’ definition is out of date, out of touch with reality and most importantly insulting to the hard-working, committed and talented people who serve the public every day.”

More than 3,500 people are employed in restaurants in Swindon, and for some of them the job was their first point of contact with British culture.

So the next time you see someone grossly overweight waddling out from McDonalds, remember that they’ve just been providing some migrant workers with a good cultural education.

According to some, the new Wiltshire flag (which will be flying from County Hall from tomorrow) is

a bizarre mix of psychedelic green with a big bird in the middle

‘Green with a big bird in the middle’…. Nowt wrong with that in my opinion.