Tag: silly

Feeding the children

What extremely generous actions some parents take for the benefit of their children. Take the example of one quoted in the Adver.

The only reason adults go to McDonald’s is for the children.

And as is evident from the photograph in the article, in future years they’ll be grateful for those generous actions with every ounce of their overweight bodies.

Steeplechasing, cycle-style

Anyone using the cycle routes in Swindon will be accustomed to the sort of obstacle in the photograph. They’re usually at the junction between a cycle route and a road, presumably to stop children riding straight onto the road without looking. A child on a bicycle could, just, negotiate their way around the zig-zag of barriers. For an adult the only way is to push their bicycle through or, where there is open space (as there is for most examples in north Swindon), ride round the outside, thereby making the whole thing totally pointless. The example here is one I came across today on Whitehill Way in Freshbrook, at the highly dangerous junction of… one cycle path with another cycle path. Apart from the possibility that whoever was responsible for this would like to start a new type of steeplechasing event using bicycles, just what is the point?

Making a splash

Whilst I may have concerns about the developments on the Front Garden (not least the possible need for occupants to travel by boat rather than car), for the Swindon Front Garden Action Group to claim that there was

between 1ft and 1.5ft of water covering many areas where houses are set to be built and where roads into the site have already been created.

is only half true. Some of the main roads on the site were flooded. The areas where the houses will be built were not. Even just a quick look at the plans shows that all the housing, retail and industrial developments are on higher land. As the man from the developers said

All residential development on Wichelstowe will be outside the predicted flood plain and will be built with ground floors at least 600mm above the predicted worst case flood level to give an added degree of certainty that it will not suffer in times of flood.

However, he wouldn’t be a developer if he could resist the urge to indulge in a little spinning.

Similarly all of the distributor roads serving the residential areas are designed to be above the flood level so that the communities are not cut off.

I guess the road I photographed must be serving something other than residential areas… a water park, perhaps?

Who are we?

In the rush to re-brand itself following Mr Brown’s cabinet reshuffle (one of the aims of which seems to have been to increase the length of acronyms for government departments), the old Department of Trade and Industry has got a little confused over it’s new identity, appearing correctly as the Department of Business, Enterprise & Regulatory Reform on its homepage, and as the Department of Business, Enterprise and Better Regulation on its About Us page.
(Click the images to enlarge to something readable.)

Elsewhere in the flurry of elongating acronyms, the new Department of Innovation, Universities and Skills (the new ruler of Swindon’s Research Councils) is to be commended for the choice of background colour for its website (though not on its ability to distinguish its objectives from those of the old Office of Science and Innovation).

Seeing clearly

I’m not sure how one can miss a huge conifer, but apparently one can.

For operational reasons, it has become necessary to remove one of the conifer trees at the main gate area…. The main gate area will be closed and coned off to all vehicles entering and exiting the site, whilst this work is undertaken.

The tree is being felled because there is a laser link being installed…. Without the link no data or telephony will be available to [quango 1]. The equipment and line of sight is formally agreed between BT and [quango 2].

Unfortunately the installers have now informed us the tree will interfere with the signal and there is no time to change direction on this. I am happy to arrange replanting of 2 new trees elsewhere to rebalance the situation.

Clearly nobody bothered looking along the ‘line of sight’. If they had they’d have noticed their sight obstructed by the tree. As its a conifer, they don’t even have the excuse of the tree being bare if the planning was done in winter. Project planning at its best.

Believing

I thought scepticism of everything that estates agents and housebuilders say was now second nature to most people. Clearly, there are still some exceptions. Of her not-so-nice new home in Okus (or, as the house builders call it, Angel Ridge), resident Nadia Lewis is quoted as saying

These are meant to be prestigious homes.

Since when has a four-bedroom town house in a development of 500 houses on the site of an old hospital been ‘prestigious’? Don’t get me wrong, I’ve nothing against her and her neighbours trying to get some bad publicity for the builder, to encourage them to fix the problems with their houses.* I just think it would have helped their cause more if she hadn’t made a fool of herself in the process.
* Any builder that describes Old Town as having a ‘traditional market town ambience’ or life in Swindon as ‘urban living at its best’ deserves a good dose of criticism.

A cultural education

One of the best places to learn about British culture is… a well known fast food retailer. Yes, according to their local franchisee, a McJob is a good way to get an introduction to the finer aspects of British traditions.

Paul Booth, franchise owner of five Swindon restaurants, said: “The ‘McJob’ definition is out of date, out of touch with reality and most importantly insulting to the hard-working, committed and talented people who serve the public every day.”

More than 3,500 people are employed in restaurants in Swindon, and for some of them the job was their first point of contact with British culture.

So the next time you see someone grossly overweight waddling out from McDonalds, remember that they’ve just been providing some migrant workers with a good cultural education.

Just rubbish

Whilst I’m in favour of recycling of scarce resources or where it is the most energy efficient option, Swindon Borough Council’s requirements for it’s new recycling scheme are irksome. I’ll have so many receptacles for different types of waste in my house, there’ll be little space for much else. From July, there will be two orange boxes for paper, glass, metal and textiles recycling; clear bags for plastic bottles (but we’ll have to pay for these, to encourage us only to put them out for collection when full); green bags for garden waste; and a dark grey wheelie bin for anything else that the council won’t recycle.

Then there are the special conditions. The lids of the wheelie bins must be completely shut. I can see the intention: this, along with not collecting any over-spill waste that is not in the bins, is intended to persuade people to recycle more. But I can also foresee yobs walking down a street randomly opening wheelie bin lids, just for the ‘fun’ of seeing them being left unemptied. There’s also the minor matter of what to do if your wheelie bin goes absent with out leave. The council will provide a replacement, but only if you report it’s absence to the police. With that much hassle, you might feel inclined to buy your own replacement instead. Well, you can, but the council will not empty it.

Oh well, at least I now know what a plastic bottle is.